Visiting Grandma

The only grandparent I knew well (the rest passed away before I was born, or when I was just a toddler), was my maternal grandma. I stayed with her & my uncle's family (with my two cousins - brothers) for a year or more (shucks, i can't remember!!!) starting from Pri 3.

My grandma took very good care of me. Come to think of it, I don't recall her scolding me at all. She always sided me and cooked me all my fav dishes (even dishes that none of my uncle's family like haha). I can only recall her scolding my 2 cousins, but never me. I remember the piping hot porridge and spinach for lunch, everytime i return from school. The tea breaks that she would have ready for me when I awoke from my nap. My favourite cabbage rice & chicken wings for dinners. She was very good with her hands, and I remembered grandma helping me with my artwork. She would mould lifeless plasticine into beautiful works of art. The purple plasticine would transform into brinjals, the red ones into apples etc. I had them in a box still stored somewhere in my old room. And when I did well in my exams (think I was in position 2 or something), my grandma bought me a box of 2B pencils. Reminiscing of these brings a smile to my face, a tear to my eyes and a tug of the heartstring but of coz, the warmth I could feel from a loved one.

Grandma passed away when I was in Sec 3. By then I no longer stayed with her, and I was not as close to her. (sigh, i'm so unfilial ... ) With the toils of being a student, the neverending exams, studies, assignment etc., life just passed without me paying my respect to my beloved grandma regularly.

Recently, mom dreamt of grandma. She didn't look good in mom's dream. She said she was hungry and she was shivering. My uncle's family do pay respects to my grandma at major events, but somehow they only served her vegetarian meals. My grandma was never a vegetarian, so their actions puzzled us really (they said the temple allowed only vegetarian food for offering?). Anyway, my mom, sis and her family and myself arranged to go to the temple to pay our respects to my grandma today. We bought lots of goodies (NON-VEGETARIAN) along with the joss papers and stuff. This temple is really odd, they locked up the place where all the urns were kept, and only unlocked the doors on major events like Qing Ming and the lunar 7th month. So we had to make do with prayers outside of the room.
I was asking whether we can relocate my grandma to another temple but well, realised that this isn't something we have control over. Uncle's family has the say. Well anyway ...

Ok, some of you out there don't believe in offering prayers to their ancestors. Some believe these are all hogwash, superstition, completely unscientific blah blah. Sure, you are entitled to your own opinion and I respect that. However, I'm one who believes in paying respect to one's ancestors. Everyone has their own belief system, and let's try to coexist cordially, respecting one another's religion and belief system without passing judgement nor uncalled for comments.

Anyway, being able to visit grandma today makes me feel better. Grandma had been very kind to me, took good care of me when I was young. When both my parents werehard at work making a living to support the family. Without grandma, I would not have been well taken care of. I feel bad always for not doing much for my grandma when she was alive. Though I have never been disrespectful to her, but I feel a sense of regret not being able to do anything for her, and I am guilty for not even regularly paying respects to her. (Hmm, I got to change that) I got to remind myself to do that more often in future. I just hope that the next time someone dreams of my grandma, she would be smiling and saying that she is living well. Does it sound silly ? I dunno. I know some of you must be frowning as you read this. Nevermind that. But I guess I just want to know that no matter where she is now, my grandma is well and good.

Do you have someone you have not visited for a long time ? If so, take time out to visit this someone. Nothing can be more important than the people around you, the people that make you. Work is secondary. We have to constantly take time out to reflect, and reprioritise what is most important to us. Health and happiness should always rank right on top, before $$, career, success. These are things that hold no meaning and worth, it doesn't make us, it ruled us (in a negative way).

Ok, just some random thoughts at this odd hour ... I'll be surprised if anyone read til the end of this post. If you had, thank you.

:)